humerous goofs - Woodworking Talk - Woodworkers Forum
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post #1 of 55 Old 02-19-2009, 12:35 PM Thread Starter
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humerous goofs

Thought it might be fun to share some humerous shop goofs, haven't seen much of that here yet. I spent ten minutes yesterday trying to figure out why a router bit went dull so fast. Burning and ripping pieces out. Then noticed the bit was running backwards. How the heck was that possible. After crawling around under the machine looking at the belt etc. I noticed a toggle switch on the back of the machine that said forward and reverse. Duh!!!!!
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post #2 of 55 Old 02-19-2009, 12:46 PM
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I have been making rings (solid out of one piece of wood so far) and last night it was late and i was just trying to get the shape of a piece. I was useing a dremel 200 series on low setting but the ring just zipped out of my hand and flew across the room...still havent found it, unfortunatly a dog will probably find it first and make it a chew toy :p
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post #3 of 55 Old 02-19-2009, 12:54 PM
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Never having worked with trim, I put trim around my basement. I spent about an hour standing in the gargage staring at the trim trying to figure out why the 45's wouldn't match up... you have to cut them on the same face. It became obvious after I figured it out.

I thought I wanted a career, turns out I just wanted paychecks.
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post #4 of 55 Old 02-19-2009, 02:38 PM
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I've never made a goof... Only firewood...

OK... there was this one time I made a rabbet joint two times on the wrong side... until I realized I could turn the stooopid board over...

Then there was this time I was helping a friend and he was cutting a series of 8 ft boards to length. I told him to BE CAREFUL to NOT cut the wrong end of the board off....

He struggled for half an hour trying to figure out what end was the WRONG end... before I got back...

I cut that board three times and it's STILL too short!!!...
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post #5 of 55 Old 02-19-2009, 02:44 PM
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I guess the worst I ever did was cut the rabbit for
the mirror on the wrong side of the frame.

It was on the outer edge.

I also just finished a piece for the boat and
forgot to drill the mounting holes. When the
piece was together the drill press would not
reach with out hitting the sides so I did the
counter sinks with an old hand drill. The egg
beater type.
It is "cordless" BTW!

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post #6 of 55 Old 02-19-2009, 04:16 PM
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Well as a newbie I make plenty of mistakes but this was the best so far...geesh........

I had just completed the last of 16 mortises I was cutting in four table legs. Now mind you this was my first EVER furniture project. I was putting off starting because being the totally anal person i am, i didn't want to make a naive......anyway I measured and re-measured for days, analyzed layout lines a thousand times, procrastinated making the first cut because I didn't want to ruin the wood, was intimidated by the fact that this was the first EVER time using a router of any kind. You get the idea.

So after much practice on scraps I finally started. Set up my jig and everything went suprisingly smooth. The plunge router I was using (Bosch) worked wonderfully. It wasn't the beast I thought it would be at all. Cut the mortises like butter. Then it happened. I finsihed the last one....the LAST ONE mind you....and i had a funny feeling......i set my plunge router down carefully and went back to inspect my work..............ugh.........I cut that last darn mortise on the WRONG EDGE of the was supposed to be on the outer half just like the one above it but I cut it on the inside edge....I don't think the apron would quite line up that way huh?........

I had to glue up a totally new blank for the 4th leg and start over from scratch............ugh.......
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post #7 of 55 Old 02-19-2009, 08:51 PM
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Glued the paper towel to my hand while doing a CA finish on a pen. Grabbed it to pull it off and stuck to the other hand. Well being the bright person I am as soon as it started burning I again grabbed it with the first hand. Needless to say I ended up with CA burns on both hands.
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post #8 of 55 Old 02-20-2009, 12:00 AM
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feather board

I've made plenty of firewood and dumpster art. anyway,
This newby was wondering around HD and found this cool hard rubber feather board with magnetic pads. The magnets had tremendous holding power, even in the package. Great No clamping! Had to have it! only $30.00. Brought it home and then it dawned on me; my router table is MDF and the TS table is aluminum....duh!

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post #9 of 55 Old 02-20-2009, 09:43 AM
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I suck with crown moulding. Nevertheless, I decided to put some up at my old house. In the bathroom, no less. It was a small bathroom and the house was a country style house... in the country... so I put beadboard on the ceilling with a flat 1x8 on the wall next to the ceiling as a base for the crown. After much deliberation, I started cutting the crown moulding and, despite the walls in this new house being bowed like mad, the crown moulding went up beautifully.

However, since this was a bathroom, I decided to caulk it with silicone caulk before I painted it white....or TRIED to paint it white!

It looked great after I scraped all the silicone out and recaulked it. Ever tried to scrape silicone caulk?!? I learned some lessons.
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post #10 of 55 Old 02-20-2009, 10:48 AM Thread Starter
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This turned out to be a great thread, glad I started it. I'm not the only one that has brain spasms and gets things backwards and upside down occ. Loosing things in the shop is a frequent occurance for me. I scrupulously put things back on the peg board and in there drawers to avoid looking for things later. Another incident yesterday was while emptying my large shop vac I dropped the plastic filter nut in the planner shavings. Now you would think you could find a one inch nut just by feeling around in the sawdust. Not so! I had to dump it all out on the floor and paw through it for another ten minutes before finding it.
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post #11 of 55 Old 02-20-2009, 04:15 PM
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Night before last I was making half blind dovetails on the drawer fronts of the dressers I'm building. I finished the last cut and grabbed the hose to the dust collector and cleaned off the bench. I then turned the guide fingers over on the D4R jig and discovered a screw was missing. After determining that about a foot of sawdust is residing in the dust collector I looked up the Leigh site and phoned customer service. The replacement screws are a nickel each. She seem surprised when I asked for 40 of em. A whole $2 worth.

Spilling wine on oak does not make it purpleheart!
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post #12 of 55 Old 02-20-2009, 04:26 PM
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Originally Posted by Terry Beeson View Post
I've never made a goof...
...they are prototypes!

One of my many was a large cabinet for my shop. 4'x3'x7' tall. I used heavy duty adjustable screw-type feet since the concrete in the basement wasn't perfect next to the outside wall. I adjusted it level with a wrench by tilting it up slightly while positioning it. However, after I filled it with all my books, manuals, shop notes binders, etc. it racked from the weight. So I needed to level it some more. Ooops. I can't get to the feet with the wrench. I had to unload the bottom fixed shelf, bore 4 1" holes in it to get a big screwdriver on the top of the screws to adjust them.
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post #13 of 55 Old 02-20-2009, 04:57 PM
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I was not going to admit to this, but since I am
among friends(??) I will.

A few years ago it was building an RC airplane
and made two left wings for it!

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post #14 of 55 Old 02-20-2009, 05:16 PM
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I have been known to make 2 of each side of something. Of course this is always done when a rabbet for the back has been cut.
I've also been known to take a measurement...let's say 11 3/4"...make the cut and find I am exactly 1" short...10 3/4". Cuss, swear, stomp...get my thoughts together and go right back to the saw and do it again.
That's when it's time to shut the lights off and close up shop for the day.
My barrel stove in the shop comes in handy.

Never lick a steak knife.
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post #15 of 55 Old 02-20-2009, 05:22 PM
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LOL....this is outstanding stuff........

I can't tell you how many times I have taken a measurement for something, then stared right at the darn ruler or tape in front of my nose and measured and cut the board wrong anyway.....
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post #16 of 55 Old 02-20-2009, 05:44 PM
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When I use my scroll saw, I like to round the back of the blades. I do this with a small sharpening stone. The smoothness of the back of the blade prevents it from biting into the wood and makes it easier to control. Anyway, I just put in a new blade and beautifully rounded the back of it. Started cutting, or shall I say burning the wood. When I looked at it closer, I had the blade in backwards and had just ground every tooth off of a new blade.

There is a very fine line between a "hobby" and a "mental illness"
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post #17 of 55 Old 02-20-2009, 06:50 PM
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Let me think.... there have been so many....

I was reusing some 3/4" plywood to make the top of my home computer desk. This isn't a simple straight board on legs. It is copied from a piece that I saw at a Big Lots furniture department. It sits in a corner and has space for two computers and some shelves along the walls. The top is "L" shaped and has a cut out area for the keyboard tray to sit lower than the desk top.

So I'm all set up and making the cuts with my 7" circular saw. Everything looks great... except I forgot that the piece had been marked for cutting on the bottom side when I attached the keyboard tray. The keyboard tray was somehow standing straight up from the top of the desk with the keyboard upside down.

Easy fix..... turn the desk top over. Except now it wouldn't go where I wanted it to go in the room, so had to rearrange the room to fit the desk.

If Woodworking is so much fun why isn't it called WoodFUNNING?

I've made a few videos
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post #18 of 55 Old 02-20-2009, 07:07 PM
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Goof, Duh??

Ok, This is only one of many: I had to build a cabinet for our basement a few years ago. Just a box, some adjustable shelves and doors with Euro hinges; nothing fancy, but it was big and heavy - finished size around 48 W, 56 high and 11 deep. I made it from 3/4 inch Luan, so you can imagine what this monster weighed. Well I went along meausring and cutting and measuring and cutting, you know.... glued it, put it all together with nice joinery. Had a buddy come over the day it was ready to mount on the wall in an area 48" wide, when I realized I had made the INSIDE dimension 48" so the outside dimensions were 1 1/2 inches more and it didn't fit. The inside was a perfect 48 so I did a good job of measuring, too bad I never looked at the plans. Needless to say, you could hear me in the next city. I had to cut it apart and almost start from the beginning. Aaargh! Measure twice and cut once??? Didn't work for me; I need a new brain.
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post #19 of 55 Old 02-20-2009, 07:40 PM
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I was making some pullout shelves for a pantry cabinet. I was using Blum undermounts and they need to have the drawer 3/8" smaller than the opening. Well I made the shelves which were drawers with short sides, notched them and put the whole in them. Got them all sanded up nice and decided to give them a test try before putting a finish on them. This is something I never do because I trust myself. I put them in and they don't even fit through the opening. Gee, forgot to subtract the 3/8".

They are mostly used in my shop now, can't just throw all my mistakes away.

Measure Twice Cut Once -- It's a lot easier to cut more off then it is to cut MORON.
Finishing is 3 parts chemistry and 1 part VooDoo
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post #20 of 55 Old 02-20-2009, 07:52 PM
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I don't make such goofs, but a friend of mine made a goof while building a large book case. The book case was intended to fit perfectly in a specific location in a guy'/client's basement and was intended to fit floor to ceiling. The guy/client's house was over an hour away and my friend had never actually been to the guy/client's house, so he (my friend) took measurments supplied by the guy/client as to how big the finished product should be. When the bookcase was finished and delivered, they moved it into position and started erecting the piece into place when they noticed it wouldn't stand up - you guessed it! - it hit the ceiling long before it reached the vertical position against the wall.

I'll keep thinking - maybe, I'll come up with a personal goof.
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